There was no war as we crossed the Canadian countryside, from Toronto to BC, in our Jeep Grand Cherokee, fresh from the lot only 3 months before. We had just sold our house in Toronto. Barry had also sold his neighbourhood café and officially retired. We were ripe for adventure. 

Our ultimate destination in BC would land us in Kelowna for a couple of weeks of dog-sitting. But weeks before that, our first stop would be a visit with friends and family living in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan. From there we would make our way to the border crossing between Minnesota and Lake of the Woods, Ontario. It was that leg of the journey when “bad thing numero uno’” hit – literally.

A load-bearing truck passed on the opposite side of a two-lane highway. Barry saw something fly from the truck. I, as navigator, had my eyes on a map. In the split second that the object hit, I heard only the BANG and Barry’s expletives. “What the hell just happened?” I yelled. Barry veered to the side, got out and stood in front of the car shaking his head with a look bordering on disbelief/anger. I braced myself as I got out to join him. A flying object hit the Jeep hood and bore a 4” hole straight into the innards of the hood space. It was a near perfect round and I could see that whatever had hit was lodged and held in place inside. Click here to see video. It took a few minutes to take in what just happened. After the initial shock, gratitude welled. If that object had flown on a slightly higher trajectory it would have smashed through the windshield into my face. And it would have happened so fast there would have been no time to react. Guardian angels? Random acts of chaos? I have no absolutes; but I like the idea of angels.

Before we got to Kelowna, where we could get the hole repaired, “bad thing number two” happened. We had left from a windy, but warm, 4-day visit in Medicine Hat, where Barry’s cousin lives, to arrive in Waterton-Glacier Park in SW Alberta. It was October 8th, and while our friends and family back in Toronto were enjoying summer temperatures, we arrived in a snowstorm and minus 12 degrees. The joke was on us, as we had left Toronto with the intention of being south for the winter. We did our check-in at the Waterton Lakes Motel. Our room was located around the corner from the main building, so I headed our car towards the parking area in front of our building. 

Before I tell you what happened next, I’m reminded of something that a friend of ours, who is a worldwide cyclist, had said just before we left Toronto. He told me not to forget that the bikes were on the roof. I laughed and thanked him for the good (although seemingly obvious) advice. 

Seems it wasn’t so obvious. I did forget. I drove the car straight under the overhang roof in front of the main motel building. The sign said “Warning, 7’, 6” clearance”. Barry’s bike, on top of our roof, was clearly higher than that. With Barry’s extremely loud expletives (I was sure that the whole sleepy town heard it), we stepped out into the snowstorm to see that his bike seat had been ripped off and the car rack was bent in half, barely holding his bike in place. We were hours from the nearest city. Who knew where a bike rack could be found? And we weren’t leaving our bikes behind. Meanwhile the fury of winter hell was throwing down blankets of snow.

The next few hours found me calling Lethbridge to see how quickly we could get a replacement rack. (It wasn’t quick.) Little did I know that as I was calling around, Barry worked like a snow-covered dervish, maneuvering a solution with duct tape. Ingenious. Who would have thought a bike rack could be duct taped back together with enough strength to hold a 50 lb. bike. Ten things we can’t live without? For sure duct tape and “a tenacious Barry” are on the list. 

A few months later, “bad thing number three” showed up. We had left Penticton with our revitalized Airstream in tow, and had already spent a month in sunny California. Our next stop was Borrego Springs – a valley surrounded by mountains and the largest state park in California. The last leg of the drive into the valley was a 17-mile, 10% grade. That’s when we heard an odd sound, but we weren’t about to stop on a narrow, winding, mountainous road if we didn’t have to. We made it to the base of the mountain and then the engine sputtered to a stop. Barry managed to get it to start one more time, to get us to our designated RV spot. Then that was it. The little engine that could, just couldn’t anymore. 

A call to the nearest Jeep dealership 1.5 hours away, had them whirl in the next morning, take Barry with them, do a diagnosis and send him off with a rental vehicle. That engine had to be replaced (with only 16,000 km on it). We worried that our warranty might be obsolete because we had pushed the diesel engine with the towing, but they said they can read everything on the computer and we had done nothing to overload it. WHEW! Our guardian angels, in charge of warranty coverage, were on the job. Or maybe it was just Barry again. Our warranty didn’t cover a replacement vehicle. WHAT? They had to be kidding. Our Jeep was a baby, only 7 months old - it needed its engine replaced and we were in an isolated place. He argued like a bulldog for a replacement vehicle until they relented. 

We ended up spending 3 weeks longer in this part of California than we had planned as we waited for the engine to arrive. But with daily sunshine, hiking in canyons, and our bodies intact, we were grateful to survive and thrive despite the “bad things in threes”. As a matter of fact, we disproved that myth. Strange things continued to happen to the trailer and the Jeep. But that’s another story.

Whether by nature, or because of this, Mathew was an introvert when he was young and “lived inside his head”. He didn’t have any long-term friends until he went to university. He’s more of an extrovert now. His mother was a librarian who worked from time to time on base or in some of his schools. She loved books and was a prolific reader; she would read a book or more a day. Mathew has 2 older brothers. He likes to say that while most kids leave home, his parents left home. When he was 17, they went back to Germany, but he had no interest in going there. He went to York University in Toronto instead, but bombed out first year, as he didn’t take it seriously.

He decided he needed to take time off to think and went into Katimavik https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Katimavik for 9 months. He spent a few months cutting down trees in a tiny farming village on the St. Lawrence in Quebec, then worked in a regional centre with children with intellectual and developmental disabilities in Smith Falls. This affected him pretty deeply and he still thinks about those kids. It was very rewarding work. The kids could be difficult, but when they were happy or glad to see you, it was the best thing that ever happened to them; their emotions were so pure. His last months were spent working on a rainbow trout breeding programme in B.C.

After Katimavik, he lived with his oldest brother for a while in downtown Toronto and worked as a bicycle courier. “I don’t recommend it; I’m surprised I didn’t die.” Then his bike got stolen, so that was the end of that.

He went and lived with his middle brother at Waterloo U. at a co-op, a sort of cohousing model with students, and really liked it. He applied to the university and was accepted, getting an English degree. He worked at the student newspaper and thought it was super fun, so applied to study journalism at Ryerson.

While at Waterloo he had become friends with Becky’s brother, Dave. When she met Mathew, she “fell head over heels in love”, he says. Does she say that? “You’ll have to check with her to see if that’s an accurate description of what happened.” After about 3 months dating, Becky lent Mathew her car for a weekend, and while driving to the cottage, a guy pulled out in front of him at 1 a.m. with no headlights on. Mathew hit him going about 120km/hr. Mathew broke his leg, dislocated a hip and cracked 8 ribs. He spent 6 weeks in traction and 3 months in a cast/brace. He now has a little arthritis in the hip and one leg is shorter than the other, but no real problems popped up and he attributes this to starting to run with Becky at age 42.

He and Becky got married just before he got his first job working in Edmonton for a weekly news magazine, Alberta Report, that doesn’t exist anymore (1). It was run by an old newspaper man who got religion and became a bible-thumping, gay-hating curmudgeon, so it was a news magazine with a layer of this kind of crazy stuff. It never made any money and they let him go. Just before, though, he talked to a guy from the Financial Times of Canada who told Mathew he should come to Toronto.

He did, and they offered him a job if he took a securities course and learned about the stock market. That’s where the jobs were, so he did, and worked for them for about 3 years before moving to the Globe to write about the stock market. The Canadian Financial Times shut down and no longer exists (2).

They went back west to Calgary, where he wrote about oil and gas and Western business. They loved living near the mountains – they could jump in the car and be surrounded by amazing peaks, lakes and trails. It was good for skiing, though they gave up downhill when they moved back to Ontario because it was never going to be the same.

Back to Toronto in 2000, he joined the web team at the Globe. He was the business/technology columnist. Social media came along and the Globe asked him to become the Communities Editor, figuring out all the new platforms for the Globe and its reporters to use. He then left and joined a blog network called Gigaom out of San Francisco, run by a friend. He wrote about technology and its impact on media for about 5 years until it ran out of money and shut down (3). He got a job at Fortune magazine and was there 2 years until he was let go for financial reasons. He wound up as the Chief Digital Writer for the Columbia Journalism Review and is still there. Let’s hope it never runs out of money.

Mathew and Becky have 3 daughters: Caitlin 32, Megan 28 and Zoe 23. M&B spend their summers at Mathew’s family cottage; his great-grandmother bought it. He likes to kayak, canoe, hike and camp. He has played guitar since he was 16. He used to paint and draw; he hopes to do more of that when he retires. He still hand-makes Becky a birthday and anniversary card every year.

They are doing cohousing-lite now; they picked the perfect time to move in with Kris & Mark -- whom they have known 40+ years -- just before Covid hit. They had them to go on walks and have dinner with, and it was great having the whole property. Two separate houses mean they can be together, or not, as much as they want to be. When Kris’ mom and Mathew’s mom passed, it was good to have each other around and to help shoulder the load.

Judy was born in Hamilton. Dad got a job with Ontario Hydro working as an operator in generating plants and they moved around a lot. Her first 4 years were in Binbrook, a small farming community near Hamilton, and her first school was a one-room schoolhouse. They moved to Swift Rapids, which was so remote at the time you could only access it by plane or boat. Mom was an RN and worked as the unofficial volunteer community nurse. They moved in and out of Orillia a few times, then to Walkerton, and she completed Grade 13 in Campbellford. She did not go to university as the family couldn’t afford to even consider that.

She had 2 brothers, one older and one younger by 4 years. Both died at age 57 (!) from different causes. Her younger brother had no children and the older one had 2 adopted children. She keeps in touch with them.

Judy moved to Toronto after high school to work. She says her career reads like “Gone with the Wind”; she has worked in many different industries and sizes of companies. Here is a summary of where she has worked. Hang onto your hats.

1. IBM in the cost accounting department. While there she started dating a jazz musician and spent time in coffee houses and jazz clubs. She met a woman there who was working in the modelling business and who recommended Judy to the leading photographic modelling agency in the country…

2. The Betty Milne agency where she did the booking of the models. They had all the high fashion and runway models, tv commercials, catalogue and magazine publications.

3. While there Judy applied to a personnel recruiting agency. While waiting for an interview, the manager walked by and they recognized each other – he had been an erstwhile model. He hired her on the spot because her experience fit so well with matching people to jobs.

4. She started her own recruiting agency with another woman from that agency. They’d had pretty good corporate clients who were used to dealing with them and the clients came with them. While working there she got a call from Tommy Ambrose who had his own national tv show…

5. They had met through her musician boyfriend. He asked if she wanted to run the office in his new company doing musical jingles for advertising. It was a fun industry to be in, not structured, but long hours. Judy says it was exactly like Mad Men; there was a lot of drinking. (She didn’t do the drinking, the clients did.) Tommy was the creative talent behind the jingles and she had to track him down all the time – most often at the Four Seasons bar, where she asked them to send him home. She ended up in sales in Toronto and Montreal. She spent a lot of time in recording studios and got to know big names in the business – Moe Kaufman for instance.

6. Judy worked as a bookkeeper and office manager for a real estate company, then got her license and sold real estate for 3 years in “the worst market in the world” – first mortgages were 14%. Her timing was terrible, but she met lots of interesting people. She really enjoyed sales and marketing so…

7. Joined Xerox in their brand-new word processing division. She was a major account rep and was headhunted out of there to…

8. Intel Term Systems, a Bell subsidiary. It went under in 2 years because “Bell had no clue how to function in a competitive arena (and still doesn’t).”

9. Computer Land as the national manager for customer support and service.

10. Decided to move to Peterborough and open up a restaurant. “Because I hadn’t done that yet.” Judy opened up the “Oh My Goodness” specialty food shop. She made from-scratch comfort food. She developed her recipes herself; her signature dish was Chicken Pot Pie. Her business grew and she closed the food shop and opened a 50-seat café of the same name on George Street. 40% of her volume was catering, business she drummed up by knocking on doors. She got some large agencies – Community and Social Services and both school boards. She closed the restaurant after 6 years. She says she couldn’t compete any longer, was not licensed and had kept her prices low.

11. Back to the corporate world. Judy had her own business selling magnetic therapy products from Japan. She sold disability coverage for self-employed people for a life insurance company, and then long-term care insurance policies for another company.

Whew. Enough about work; she’s retired now. When Judy moved to Peterborough, she rented the top part of Lyn’s house. They had a lot of things in common and within 6 months were in a relationship. They moved to Westwood and bought a renovated church; they lived there 15 years. They loved it out there.. Both started attending the United church that was across the road from where they were living. They left and bought a smaller house in Ptbo so they could age-in-place. They now feel the need to move into cohousing.

She has a married son and grandson, who live in Milton. She and Lyn are unofficial grandparents to a Sierra Leone family with three kids, two of whom are now in high school. They met at church when the adorable twins were 3 years old.

Judy’s hobbies are singing, which she has done in many choral groups over many years: church, barbershop, jazz and pop. They have an extensive garden. She loves to cook, of course, and she misses the hospitality part of the restaurant. She’s a Raging Granny and is Treasurer for 3 organizations. She is a social activist; she and Lyn both do a lot to support various organizations in town. “I want to see people treated fairly and equitably.” She feels blessed and realizes that she grew up at the right time in history when it was easy to find work.

Judy likes the concept of cohousing. She attended Scott Donovan’s presentations years ago. She thinks KCC is doing an excellent job of setting the ground work, and that it’s a really good group of people.